“Though she be but little, she is fierce.” I may be (very) tired right now, but I am strong and I am a hard worker. Things are coming together, and I hope ***fingers crossed*** that something big is about to happen for me in my career. And if not, I’ll just keep on lifting big people. =)
Last month, I agreed to do a sample shoot for the catalog of a company in which my freelance employer invests. The product, a line of collegiate-branded women’s sleepwear, seemed right up my alley (seriously, who doesn’t love pajamas??), though it had been a while since I’d done a shoot. Although it was fun (my photographer, Tara Arseven, was just wonderful: personable, intelligent, and funny), the experience was a good reminder that I simply am not keen on attempting to use my appearance to make a living when I could (less stressfully, and with fewer creepers) use my talents to do the same. If nothing else, some of the attire was just skimpier than I am comfortable being photographed: about the least I’m okay with wearing tends to be a sports bra and spandex shorts for a sports-related shoot.
He (my freelance boss) wanted to do a re-shoot with another photographer as well, and had talked about me rebuilding my portfolio, but it felt good to be able to say with certainty that I would prefer to focus on my writing/editing/marketing and that I’m not interested in any sort of modeling right now.
There were some nice images, including the ones I’ve posted here…but what I really liked about the shoot was the glimmer of my genuine smile coming back (not counting the one with the straddle hold below: my face was showing the strain of holding the position, but cool athletic things >>> being attractive). For me, this was evidence of the fact that hard times don’t last forever: I was bound to be back to my old self again, just better, stronger, wiser, and hopefully kinder than ever before. Hurt doesn’t have to last forever.
This is the face of a woman who straight put. in. work. at the gym last night. Maybe it was the pre-workout (or the spinach ravioli, which was delicious), or maybe it was just time for me to feel badass again, but either way, everything went awesome last night. I felt inspired to try all these things I had never done before, along with knocking out some difficult reps of those I had (but not since waaay back in college), and was so surprised (though maybe I shouldn’t have been?) when I could actually do them!
I’ll have to take photos (or videos) of some of those experiments, but I learned last night that I could do a pike hold on the ground, and I think I’m prettyyy close to being able to do a press-handstand. 🙂 I also just got in a bit of a “flyer” mood and decided to climb on the squat racks and do cheer-esque things, since they didn’t have any stools I could use for that. No staff members saw and asked me to hop off though, so until that happens, I’ll just keep doing that sort of thing when I get in the mood.
One plus to being able to lift heavy weights and do complicated things that require a lot of flexibility and stability is that when men stare at me at the gym, it’s much less uncomfortable because they usually aren’t just “creeping.” And if they are, I comfort myself by grabbing the bench/rack next to them and throwing on more weight than they’re using, so there’s that. 😉 But it’s a nice feeling to have people come comment on what I’m doing, ask questions, etc. rather than just stare at my ass, ask me out, or ask if I “need help” with something (I don’t). I’d really love to find a workout partner, but hopefully that will happen soon!
We elderlies decided to play around a bit after six hours at the gym tonight. After the last two weeks I’ve had, this was exactly what I needed. ❤️ Nothing complicated, but here’s one of my fellow coaches and I going for a walk-in hands to heel stretch: