The Digital Version of Loneliness: A Paradox

There are few situations lonelier than being wanted by seemingly everybody…except the one person whose attention you crave.

You know, I get hit on every day. Sometimes it bothers me more than others, but the vast majority of the time, I prefer to be left alone. You know, treated like a human being rather than an item to be possessed. That sentiment gets infinitely more painful each time someone hits on me in “real life” or I get an overwhelming number of messages on Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, LinkedIn, Twitter, freaking Words with Friends (because yes, women get hit on EVERYWHERE), etc…and meanwhile, I am being ignored by the one man who really made me believe in the possibility of forever.

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Charting My Own Waters

Perhaps that’s why it hurt so
When you left.
You had become
My guiding light
The bookends of my days
My Compass.

Ever the captain,
I resumed my rightful
Place at the helm
Readjusted the sails
And set course for
A paradise of my own making.

–Sarah Clinton

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Dating Deal-Breakers: Ladies, Know When to Run

So I’ll be the first to say that I don’t necessarily have the best luck with men (if you’ve followed my writing for very long, you can attest to this). Some of that is because I—a coach through and through—tend to see people’s potential, forgive mistakes, and assume that everyone I meet is generally trying his or her best from their own current level of consciousness.

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You Always Leave Like Rain

The rain lashed at my window
Like your words at my heart.
Cutting, biting,
Colder than I expected.

Little did you know
This was preferable
To the Silent void left
As you faded day by day.

–Sarah Clinton

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Lingering Shadows Unbidden

December 2, 2017

Dear God,
You’re going to make me crazy.
It’d be so much easier
To move on
If your shadow didn’t linger
In my bed
When the throes of ecstasy
Subside.

–Sarah Clinton

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Self-confidence Sunday #17

Last month, I agreed to do a sample shoot for the catalog of a company in which my freelance employer invests. The product, a line of collegiate-branded women’s sleepwear, seemed right up my alley (seriously, who doesn’t love pajamas??), though it had been a while since I’d done a shoot. Although it was fun (my photographer, Tara Arseven, was just wonderful: personable, intelligent, and funny), the experience was a good reminder that I simply am not keen on attempting to use my appearance to make a living when I could (less stressfully, and with fewer creepers) use my talents to do the same. If nothing else, some of the attire was just skimpier than I am comfortable being photographed: about the least I’m okay with wearing tends to be a sports bra and spandex shorts for a sports-related shoot.

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Self-confidence Sunday #11

Maybe things don't need to be easy. Maybe I needed him to come into my life, make me happy, make me hope and dream and love and plan...and then leave me, making me feel so out of control that I am desperate to make needed changes to my life. Maybe someday, I will thank him for this.

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